Fear Tally

Overcoming fear

“It is well documented that as humans we grow by facing challenges.” This quote is from the book Raising Mentally Strong Kids by Daniel G. Amen, MD, and Charles Fay, Ph.D.

Speaking of challenges, in March 2025, I discovered an awesome app called Rejecto. The app had a series of challenges to be completed. An easy challenge was to “ask a stranger if you could pet their dog.” A medium challenge was to “ask a stranger for their phone number.” A hard challenge was to “ask a hotel for a room upgrade.” I loved this app! The challenges greatly helped me grow out of my comfort zone. Plus, the community on the app was very encouraging.

In 2026, the creators of Rejecto transformed the app into Alora, the love app. I hope it is helping the women they serve. However, I’m a little sad that Rejecto no longer exists. While Rejecto did help me get over my fear of rejection, I still struggled with fear. When I say fear, I don’t mean the normal human emotion or the fear associated with an automatic physical response to danger. I mean, the type of fear that “in today’s context, this instinctual response is often unnecessarily and excessively triggered, leading to chronic states of anxiety, stress, and even physical ailments” (”Is Fear Running Your Life”, 2024).

The type of fear that has planted seeds deep in my heart, and has grown into a powerful weed. A weed I’m in the process of uprooting. I know I’m not the only person who struggles with this type of fear. As a way to uproot my fear, I have placed a sticky note with a tally on my wall:

This is my fear tally. I can track how many times I overcome fear. Every tally so far has been a victory over fear. And if I choose safety, that’s okay too. I can accept my humanness.

I invite you to try tracking your own fear tally. Mark each moment you overcome fear, and see how it feels.

Will you join me in keeping a fear tally to help overcome fear? Take a step, mark it on your tally, and share your experience.